The final chapter 8/12/12

Yesterday, we played better water polo but still could not overcome a slow start. After going down 3 - 0 against Spain, we battled back and lost a close game 8 - 7. In the end, we could not score on our critical extra man and then we could not make the critical stop. Another disappointment. It has been tough to overcome our broken dream. The 48 hours after losing to Croatia were very difficult to say the least. Walking around our players rooms was like being in a funeral home. I don’t blame them. I know I was having a very difficult time processing our loses and getting myself out of a fog. We had a few good meetings as a team and talked about playing the last two games out with pride and for each other. This is the last time this team will play together. Ryan Bailey stepped up and challenged the guys “to play for their character as men. He said, even if we get beat, we need to go out there and give it our best shot. Do not have any regrets about the way that you play”.



I shared a story with the team about my final game with the national team in 1992 at the Barcelona Olympic Games. We had lost to Spain in the semi-final game. In a similar situation - our dream was over - and we had to find a way to get ourselves ready for the bronze medal game against Russia the next day. The bottom line is that we could not overcome the loss in the semis and we played with very little passion or excitement. We finished fourth in the tournament and left with no medal. To this day, not being able to get the team (or myself) ready to play in the bronze medal game has been biggest regret as an athlete. It was after all my final game as a national team player and my final Olympic games and it has always left a sour note in my mind. I shared this story because I do not want these guys to have that same experience and have the same regret.



As I have reflected, processed and prayed about our situation it has occurred to me that part of our pain has been the super high expectations that we placed on ourselves. Going in it was almost as if we did not win the gold it would be a failure. Part of this had to do with our success in Beijing. Going into the Olympics in Beijing, no one expected us to do well and certainly no one expected us to win a medal. There was virtually no pressure on us going in and we were able to relax and play. Here we felt an enormous amount of pressure. Our goal was no longer to “get back to the podium” as it was in 2008. Our goal now was to climb the highest mountain and stand on top of the podium by winning the gold. We like to say “go for the gold”. Perhaps it is the American way that success is only achieved by reaching the top. While this is definitely not true, as an athlete and a coach id I don’t dream about being on the top of the podium or going for the gold - I feel I will never reach that goal. So there lies the conundrum - if we don’t dream it, say it and talk about it how do we ever reach it? There has to be a balance in there somewhere and obviously we somehow lost that balance this year.



I also realize how difficult it is to win a gold medal in the Olympic Games and how this is especially true in a team sport like ours. There are so many pieces that all have to come together at the right time and for us in this Olympic Games some of those pieces did not come together. My hat is off to all of the gold medalist here at these games - especially Coach Adam Kerkorian and the USA Women’s water polo team. They beat Spain on Thursday night to win the first gold for America in water polo in 100 years. They played an outstanding game and won 8 - 5. It was a special moment.



The village is quieting down. Many athletes and teams are done now and have left. There is a totally different vibe now - especially since we are playing on the final day for 7th place instead of a gold medal. Even though this is a difficult, we have to realize that God has a plan and that our dreams and goals do not always fit into that plan. The journey that we have shared together is very special and we have all learned from each other and often times in life the toughest situations and the greatest defeats or loses teach us the most. Traveling the world with this team, we have shared some tremendous experiences. We have laughed until our stomachs hurt and cried on each others shoulders - we have experienced together the full spectrum of human emotions. We have learned about love, trust and respect and built a relationship as a team based on those traits. I would not trade this experience for anything. I read an article the other day that said “the Olympics are less about who wins the gold, and more about a gold standard of living.” I would agree and it is my hope that this experience has made us all better men, better friends, better husbands and better dads.



I close this final chapter with gratitude. First, I want to thank my staff. Robert Lynn, Marco Palazzo, Rick McKee, Karen Bloch, Alex Ash and Jack Kocur for all of their commitment, dedication and hard work. They are rarely recognized for what they do and yet they are vital for our success. I would also like to thank all of the athletes that were a part of this team (whether they made the final team or not). I am very proud of their sacrifice and their commitment to making their Olympic dream come true. Many of these guys will retire and move on to their careers outside of the pool. I wish them all the best as they transition out of sport and into the “real world”. To the guys that will continue on, I wish them all great success in their future - perhaps there is a gold medal out there. I hope I can be involved at some level with the National team going forward. I would also like to thank all of the families of the players and coaches (including mine). Their love and support allow us to do what we do and they share in our pain at this time. Finally, I appreciate so much all the support that so many in the Conejo Valley have given to me and our team. I am thankful to the Ventura County Star for allowing me to share our journey with all of you. Although, it has not turned out the way that any of us had hoped for - it surely has been quite an adventure. Tomorrow is a new day and it time to move forward with some new goals and new dreams...



And yes, I will still see you at the pool!



Coach